The following entry is an extremely important public service announcement for the entirety of the internet and the culture it has consequently spawned, causing seepage into humanly-interactive day-to-day reality.
Presenting, an excerpt from Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang — the satirically informative third coming from HRH Chelsea Handler.
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I wrote down my address and asked her where the wedding was.
I wasn’t joking, but I quickly lost interest in the conversation due to the fact that despite my having spoken to Lydia at great length about misplaced enthusiasm , she insisted on using exclamation points in lieu of periods and continued pairing them with my least favorite invention, LOL. You wouldn’t say LOL if you were out to lunch with someone, so why would you write it in an instant message or an e-mail? Just laugh alone in your office or house. I don’t need to be notified that you’re laughing. If someone is busy laughing, then how do they have the time to be typing the letters LOL?
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A wryly witty peep into the life of a thirty-something comedian with a penchant for miscellaneous shenanigans and a high tolerance for vodka, Chelsea Handler will take you on multiple misadventures throughout the chapters, narrating each detail with sarcastic candor and laying down her views in a boldy unapologetic manner.
I feel it important to mention that I read the above paragraph within earshot of schoolgirl hysterics over a tween magazine “love” quiz and gossip on the topic of who possesses most knowledge of hallway gossip. Hilary is totally still a virgin!
And on THAT note…
“When life hands you lemons, squeeze them into your vodka.“
P.S. — Just get the fucking book. I say this with adoration, not because I’m being paid via sexual favours. Those sort of deals are reserved for official employees of Chelsea Lately and the E! network.
And follow Chelsea on Twitter!